Sunday, November 30, 2014

It's over, so clean out the reefer!

You're drowning in a refrigerator packed with a half-empty carton of whipping cream, a ziplock bag of stuffing, a Tupperware dish of cranberry sauce, a container of leftover sweet potatoes, one unopened package of dinner rolls,cheese,  a big bag of turkey, three half-eaten pies, a dish of leftover mashed potatoes, a bowl of gravy, an extra two pounds of bacon (you bought too much), a dozen bagels, half a dozen English muffins, a loaf of pumpkin spice bread, cheese,  two opened bags of salad mixes from Costco, jams and preserves that relatives brought as hostess gifts, six Costco muffins, cheese, and two and a half cans of Redi-Whip (they came in a 3-pack).

It's a friggin' nightmare.  They haunt you.  They call your name.  "Hey, we're in here.  Hey, don't waste us because there are starving people all over the country.  Hey, we're special and Thanksgiving is special so you can't throw us away.  Hey, you only do it once a year.  Hey, you paid for us so you should eat us.  Hey, you worked so hard to prepare us that now you should enjoy us!"
Meanwhile, you're looking in the mirror and facing the truth.  You feel like a blimpo, under the direct control of those damn leftovers.  And they're all SO GOOD/.

No, they're not.  Chew on this:

"Nothing TASTES as good as being thin FEELS." 

 It's absolutely true.  I've been there.  So have you.  In fact, you said this to yourself WHEN YOU WERE THIN, but then you forgot its potency.  So now's the time to look those leftovers in the face and tell them you know the truth.  THANKSGIVING IS OVER.  The celebratory eating is OVER.  You're not allowed to have turkey, sweet potatoes and stuffing on any day except Thanksgiving.  It never tastes as good when it's heated up anyway.  What you didn't eat on Thanksgiving is now garbage.  If you can't give it to your neighbors or to your spouse for dinner tonight, GET RID OF IT.  As soon as it's gone, your mind will be quieted and you can once again start feeling like a thin person in control of her own weight and body.

Sometimes having a full pantry and a full refrigerator can put you at ease.  Other times it's like having a thousand demons lurking behind those doors. screaming at you to open them and step inside their world of high-calorie binge eating. If the food in your home is haunting you, "exorcise" it NOW.  Throw it out.  Clear your mind and cleanse your palette. 

Thin people have bare refrigerators and sparse pantry shelves. 

Toss your leftover leftovers into the trash can, and then bring the garbage outside.

You've just started acting like--and becoming--a thinner person.  Don't you feel better already? 

Enjoy the journey.